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Wednesday, March 01, 2006

Thoughts on Ash Wednesday

"Remember man that thou art dust and unto dust thou shalt return."

I'm feeling kind of biblical tonight. Today is Ash Wednesday, the beginning of 40 days of spiritual preparation for Easter, the celebration of Our Lord's Resurrection.

It's also 40 days today since my husband died. Peter, same name as the point Apostle, the rock Christ selected to build his church. Pete was my own personal rock, and he's already returned to dust. That's still a difficult fact for me to get my mind around. It takes a lot longer than 40 days and 40 nights to process a loss like this.

We were married for 33 years, which was Our Lord's age at the time of his crucifixion.

It's going to be a different Lent for me this year. I won't be wrestling between omitting peppermints in the morning or cookies with my evening tea. At the moment, I'm not much interested in either of those trifles. This Lent, I'll be focusing more on the big picture and where the road of life is leading us. It will be quite easy for me, during these 40 days of Lent, to remember that we humans are born to die.

Prayers and tears will mix easily. They already do these days, but at least now I've got the season going for me.