Michelle Obama gave a campaign speech in North Carolina on May 2. She didn't run out of words until she reached 10,008 of them. (HT:HH)
Barack Obama's famous "More Perfect Union" speech on race was less than half that long. It makes me wonder: who's the candidate, and for what?
Mrs. O's moaning motor mouth gives new meaning to the Clintonian phrase "two for one," and it should make any voter who remembers the '90s shudder. Hillary was usually spouting off as First Lady, complaining about "vast right wing conspiracies"--which seem to have fallen out of fashion. But now we've got Big Mouth Michelle following in Hollerin' Hillary's footsteps.
At least Hillary could keep her kvetching brief. Mrs. Obama, scolding and indignant, will harangue you until your eardrums burst.
In her 10,000+ words, Michelle Obama didn't find much to praise in the country that has given her opportunity, influence, fame, a hefty six-figure income, an extremely comfortable life, and degrees from two of our most prestigious universities. In fact, she seems fairly outraged that she was actually expected to pay for such an exclusive education. I suppose after Barack gets elected, we'll have government vouchers to get everyone into Princeton and Harvard.
Michelle Obama uses words such as "alone," "struggling," "isolated," "divided," "cynical," and "fear." It's such a scary place, America, where people are "mired in debt" and living under a "veil of impossibility," where we're raising a "nation of doubters."
Listening to her paint this grim scenario, you'd think the Obamas would have taken their children and fled years ago to the safety, comfort, and promise of--China? Russia? North Korea? Nevermind. If you listen to Mrs. Obama, almost any place you can spot on a world map would be better than "struggling" in the Moving Bar of America.
And oh, the angst generated by that moving bar! The Incredible Moving Bar got a dozen mentions. You can't say she didn't warn us:
"I talk about this all the time, they set the bar...and then what happens? They move the bar. "
The nerve of "them"--whoever "they" are. If we could just figure out who "they" are, we could get "them" to stop moving "the bar" which prevents us from ever being happy in this godforsaken, depressing, broken down shell of a nation.
Michelle also lectures us that "we spend more time now in this nation talking about what we can’t do, what won’t work, what can’t change."
Now, here she could be on to something real. Because I'll tell you what I can't do--I can't vote for Barack Obama. That won't work for me. That fact can't change. Not in 10,000 words.
